The Princesses have spoken.....we are done camping!!

 

 

 

I am attaching some pics from Sloane's 4th b-day party last weekend...she loves tinkerbell and anything involving princesses...so we got into character! ;) Anyways, Sela, Sloane and I have been struggling with this camping lifestyle-don't blame us, it's not our fault-Marcus has just spoiled us so much!! We have been trying hard to hang tough in the 5th wheel and pretend we are on a LONG camping trip, but we really didn't how much longer we could handle it...so, since we were planning on selling the 5th wheel anyways at some point before we build again, Marcus told us we could just rent an apartment until then-because he wants us to be happy :) This was the best news 3 girls could have heard! So we will be moving into our sweet little apartment by Jan 15 and we will have 2 bathrooms again, washer/dryer and almost 1200 sq ft...needless to say we will feel like we are in a mansion ;) Now, we just gotta sell the 5th wheel- SO, if you are or know anyone looking for a "like new" 5th wheel-we have a 2005 Open Road, 40', 4 slide outs-ready to GO!!! Just email me and I will send pics....

Marcus has been feeling really good and will even be going back to work next week on light duty...he is so ready to get on with his life and get past chemo, labwork, drs, MELANOMA!!  So please continue to pray with us and stand in faith, in agreement that he will be healed from this beast!  He has so much life to live and so much to give-thank you all for your continued support, prayers and love!  We love you all!!!

GREAT NEWS-ALL GLORY TO GOD!!!

GOOD NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!! Marcus just got a call from MD Anderson and he is positive for BRAF mutation!!! SO if needed, he would be eligible for another array of open doors in treatment!!!! Also, very preliminary because it was from an xray yesterday, it appears that the left lung tumor appears to be stable and possibly reduced....SOOOOO, more great news to follow after we get those CT scans Jan 19-21-but we just had to let you all know this news so far!! PRAISE GOD-WE WILL CONTINUE TO STAND IN FAITH!!!!!!! PRAYERS ARE ANSWERED EVERYDAY!!!

grateful for every sigh of relief :)

Well today was full of sighs of relief!
The girls and I dropped Marcus off for his appointment with Cardiopulmonary today at MD Anderson. The fluid in his Denver Cath just has not been coming out since our last drain Dec 26-which we are grateful for, but just wanted to make sure the fluid was actually gone in the pleural cavity before the cath is removed...well, the x-ray wasn't really completely conclusive-but the dr. tried to drain cath but couldn't get anything either...so he decided to take it out! Marcus was so pleased!! BIG SIGH OF RELIEF #1!!
While Marcus was handling the Denver cath appt., I decided to take the girls to the Houston Museum of Natural Science until he was done and before their appt at 2:15.....we were blessed with a great parking spot right by the door-BIG SIGH OF RELIEF #2! and really enjoyed ourselves...dinosaurs, bugs, animals, energy, chemistry-very eventful museum tour-but my favorite part was the Butterfly exhibit! I could have stayed in there ALL DAY!! I even had a butterfly land on me-Sela was mad because she wanted one to land on her so bad-and I had to threaten to beat Sloane so she wouldn't try and grab it off my shirt and put it on hers!!! They were able to touch some dead butterflies that the nice volunteer brought by-and they seemed pretty happy with their butterfly experience! Marcus was done around 1pm and we drove back to get him, grabbed a bite to eat-then headed to their appt all together.....BIG SIGH OF RELIEF #3!!
Girls had their annual dermatolgoist appointment-first time with new pediatric dermatologist in hst-dr. hebert-she was wonderful-I guess once she saw on their paperwork that their daddy was Stage IV Metastatic Melanoma, she decided to call all interns she had in her office in the room to learn ;) She came in with about 5 interns (thankfully all female or Sela would have flipped out more than she already did!) She went over all the girls moles and explained to interns and me what they were called, what we needed to be concerned with, etc...and THANK GOD-everything on them is normal! Sloane's little new freckle on her bottom lip had me concerned-and the dr said it was good that I was aware and concerned because moles on mucousal (not sure if I really spelled that right) areas are at a higher risk of metastazing if they are Melanoma-so she said to keep a close eye on that one and keep chapstick with sunscreen on her lips! Sloane will be very happy with me now-she hates stuff on her lips unless it is sparkly-guess I am now in search of sparkly chapstick with sunscreen ;) Sela has a large mole on her back that I have never liked, but dr. says it is fine-just keep watching and come back next year-and we will! She also explained to the girls-more to Sela since she is older and actually understands-how they needed to take really good care of their skin, wearing sunscreen always, protective clothing, hats, etc. and getting their moles checked for the rest of their lives-due to the family history with their daddy-I made Sela repeat what dr. hebert told her so she couldn't get mad at me when I was hounding her about all this soon ;) And I also made her promise that even when she was a grown up she would always get her moles checked and her kid's moles checked-she agreed, but then she said, "how do you know I'm gonna have kids?" ;) I was just happy with her promising me this and for the good news about their moles being normal! BIG SIGH OF RELIEF #4!!

So Sela starts school tomorrow, Marcus goes back for labwork locally to make sure all his counts are still good, and we get back to normal life until Jan 19-21 when Marcus goes back to MD Anderson for scans to see how this CVD chemo cocktail performed! We are still standing in faith, believing that God will heal him from the inside out-and we will not accept anything else!!!! Please stand with me in faith-Love you all!!!!

2010-ready for you!!!!

Today Marcus got his neulasta shot-finished his chemo yesterday-and is ready to speak of melanoma in the past tense!!! We go back to MDA Monday for followup on his Denver cath-hoping they take it out!! Then back for scans Jan 19-21-so keep prayin warriors for positive news !!! We are still standing in faith that this chemo will work-trusting in God for a healing!!! Ready for some good news in 2010-and NO more melanoma!!!!

Happy new year!!

"Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times and in every way. The Lord be with all of you." 2 Thessalonians 3:16

Today has been a complete day of peace...Marcus was able to start his chemo back up again-on schedule-THANK YOU LORD-his temp has been normal 98.6 since 12-26, he feels better, he's eating again..things are on track!! God's plan is in action and we are watching and living in it!!

We did visit the funeral home and have to go the my Paw Paw Will's funeral tomorrow, but again, this is peaceful-not sorrowful...Paw Paw is free, finally and I am happy for him-praying he is sitting in Heaven with my Maw Maw, enjoying a big cup of coffee and breathing without his oxygen tank, with both legs-no wheelchair-finally free!!

We are still staying at my in-laws house, maybe for another day or so, and it has been nice. The girls have been playing with their cousins and enjoying their christmas break....we are a peaceful, happy family and we give all glory to God for every moment of it!!!!!

As I close, I just want you all to know how much we love y'all and we are so grateful for all your prayers....may the Lord be with all of you and give you peace at all times!!!!!

Merry Christmas after all.........

Well, for those of you that don't follow me on facebook, I just wanted to let you all know how our Christmas ended up....not exactly how we planned, but we were together after all-and that is the most important part..

So Christmas morning I left the hospital around 7am to come to my in-laws house to wake the girls up...let them open their stockings and santa gifts...then we packed up their other gifts and headed to the hospital so they could open their presents with their Daddy. He had spiked a fever the night before and we didn't know what the dr would say once he came in for rounds....

Well, girls opened their presents and we had a nice visit with their Daddy-then the dr on call decided since he spiked another fever-and after 3 days in the hospital they still had no idea what the fever was casued from-all blood tests, urine tests, etc were negative for any infection-so this dr decided to order a serious list of tests, that marcus felt were completely unnecessary-we have felt from the very beginning that his fever had something to do with his denver cath..which we haven't been able to drain much fluid out of for a week now....but no one at bapt hosp bmt would even remove the dressing to look at the denver cath-because they don't treat them-and told us they would have to send us back to MD anderson to do anything to it...so even if those multiple tests ordered would have pointed to the denver cath-they would have to transfer marcus to MD Anderson and they said that wouldn't happen to at least monday....after much discussion with nurses and med. oncologist on call-we made a decision to check out of the hospital-AMA-against medical advice and go to MD Anderson on our own....but first Marcus wanted to go home to his Mom and Dad's for Christmas, enjoy the day with our girls, his brothers and nieces and nephews....so that is what we did! I told him I was behind him completely in whatever decision he made...I saw how 3 days in the hospital had him feeling and I didn't want him to feel that way any longer...

Well, he felt pretty rough all Christmas day-the antibiotics pumped into him over the past 3 days were taking a toll on him-he had hardly ate anything the whole time and he just felt bad-but he held on and was able to sit in his dad's recliner and open gifts and visit, and even ate some food! PRAISE THE LORD! After a long day, he was finally able to shower and go to bed in a real bed-NOT A HOSPITAL BED-and relax....and he did....around midnight his fever did go up to 100.4, but he took some tylenol and went to sleep. and he slept until noon!!! Had the best rest he has had in 3 days! All day we just sat around and relaxed and he has felt pretty good. Fever has stayed around 99 all day, but he has felt ok, so that is all I can ask for. Whenever he decides what he wants to do-I am ready to do it...but he has decided to wait until monday morning and see if they have results back from the small amount of fluid that we were able to get into the tube from his denver cath 12-24-they sent that to the lab to see if it showed sign of infection but said it would take 2-3 days to get results...before he starts the second round of chemo, or goes to MD Anderson....he just really doesn't want to get stuck in the hospital-but knows he has to do something if his fever keeps spiking...

So thank God for my mother and father-in-law who have let us and our girls just do as we please today-we have rested, stuffed our faces, played games with the girls-and just relaxed...the girls actually stayed in their PJs all day!! We needed this SO much-we are truly blessed.

As I close this post I just want to ask for prayers for peace......my paw paw will passed away this morning..he has not been in good health and was 81 years old..and honestly he has not been the same since my maw maw passed away in 2001...I know he is no longer in pain and is free from the troubles of this world..I just pray he is in Heaven relaxing and having a big cup of coffee with my maw maw.

So thank you Lord for letting us have a Merry Christmas after all...we know you have a plan for us and we trust in You completely. The best gift we could ever ask for has already been given-your precious son, Jesus Christ...there is no other gift we need. THANK YOU LORD!

All glory to God-I will praise You always!!

So Marcus has been admitted now at Bapt. Hospital since around 11:45pm Tuesday-his fever went up to 103 and I made him call the dr-of course she said get yourself to the hospital asap!!! His WBC counts were very low (total count was ok but neutrophils-fighter cells-were only 300 and they are supposed to be 1000 minimum). He got antibiotics and fluids but still kept a
fever-drs decided to give him a neulasta infusion to boost those cells. I have been a praying maniac pleading with God to make his fever go away and get those neurtophils up to at least 1200-well-God is always faithful-Marcus' fever never went past 100.7 last night and his WBC went from 2000-6000 (neutrophils from 300-4000) overnight!!!!! Can someone please say AMEN??!?!?! So dr came in around 11am and said if no fever tonight and WBC counts still stay high then they will release Marcus in the morning!!!! Bringing a whole new meaning to please come home for christmas!!!! :)

I was a little emotional when I realized we wouldn't be waking up Christmas morning with the girls -but I worked it out where I will go to my in-laws house early-around 6-7am-wake the girls up and let them get their "Santa" gifts-which Sela already knows it's mom and dad gifts ;) then bring them up here to open the other gifts with their daddy-and wait until he gets released-because we are not accepting anything else-Marcus will not spike a fever tonight!!! Pray with me warriors-Marcus wants to come home for Christmas !!!!

Glorious Day

"Living He loved me, Dying He saved me, Buried He carried my sins far away...."

Words sung beautifully by Casting Crowns....words that keep me trusting and believing...

Marcus has been battling a fever over the past week and today blood was drawn to be cultured....we don't know if it is the cancer, an infection from his Denver cath or what-but it has been frustrating...
Just when he starts to feel a little better the fever comes back-so we just keep praying for God to make this fever work to kill the melanoma and then GO AWAY and leave Marcus alone!!!! As Christmas approaches, we are so thankful to God for every breath we take-and we just keep praying and trusting in the Lord to get us through this rough season of life we are traveling through right now. "One day He's coming, Oh Glorious Day"...and we are just holding on until that glorious, glorious day....

Merry Christmas-we love you all so very much!

Marcus, Mindy, Sela & Sloane Stanley

I finally feel truly born again.....

I love the song above by Third Day....they always grab my heart with their music-and open it all up to the Lord....Thank you Third Day-I love you!!

Yesterday marked a special day for Marcus and I....we celebrated 15 years of wedded bliss ;) A big milestone! Every day I have with him now seems monumental to me-it is just sad that it took Melanoma for us both to see through all the crap the world has for us and get back down to the REAL DEAL....we have grown closer as a couple and our relationship with God has been moved to a level I never dreamed....I am so eternally grateful for the love our God has given us-and the sacrifice He made by sending us Jesus...there are no words that can truly express that gratefulness.

Marcus still fatigues easily, but he is doing well. He starts his next round of chemo Dec. 28 and then will do scans in Jan. We are still standing in faith, believing he will receive a complete healing, from the inside out. Thank you all for your support-we love you all and pray you have a blessed Christmas!

I truly believe......You will Heal Marcus.........

I am attaching a video of a song that we have sung several times at church-it is very special to me-it was one of the songs they were singing during the Wednesday night service where everyone prayed on Marcus....the words truly say it all...and Jesus is all we need.....end of story.....

Marcus completed his last day of chemo today...and it was rough. He woke up this morning feeling very nauseated...and really didn't feel like getting out of bed-but he did and made it through his last infusion.....he pretty much stayed nauseated all day and has been resting since he got home around 4pm....I just keep praying he will feel better this weekend...he hates feeling like this and I hate to see him feeling like this-it makes me sad....I can't do anything, but I wish I could take it all away from him....please pray he can feel better over the next few weeks so he can enjoy Christmas...I just want him to be able to enjoy Christmas............

Speaking of Christmas...I was able to get a big chunk of shopping done today and I am glad-but I am still not finished...hopefully over the next few days I can knock it out :)

Nothing else really to say-just asking prayer warriors to keep sending the prayers-the devil is really getting that chemo to make Marcus sick-and we need it to make the cancer go away, but keep Marcus feeling good!!! Nothing is impossible through Christ....so help me pray for it!

Love you all and thank you so much again for your prayers and support of our family.

all is well

just a quick little post to let you all know that marcus is doing very well!! he completed day 2 of chemo today-and has 2 more days of this cycle....then 17 days off.  he spoke with dr. lavalais and she told him this chemo would accumulate and he may not feel anything until a few weeks after receiving treatment...but we are going to keep praying that God keeps all side effects to a minimum and he keeps feeling great!  we are still draining fluid from his denver catheter that was inserted into his chest last week-this has helped him tremendously!  he was having such a hard time breathing because of the fluid in his pleural cavity.  dr. lavalais said it may take 3-4 weeks before he sees a decrease in that fluid.

we are still standing in faith that God will use this chemo to produce a complete healing....and we will not accept anything else!!!  thank you all for your continued prayers, emails, texts and support-we love you all so very much!!

KINDNESS

Yesterday, Sela & Sloane were surprised with the most precious Christmas tree we have ever had.....my Aunt Kellie brought it to us-hand designed by her friend and co-worker, Lori Humphrey...with a special Melanoma Awareness ornament Aunt Kellie ordered for us......the kindness this gesture shows leaves me speechless....to some, it may be just a little Christmas tree, but to me and my family, this tree represents Love, Peace, Hope and everything Christmas is all about....the birth of Jesus Christ.  I knew we would have some sort of tree here in our 5th wheel, but quite honestly, I would have NEVER been able to put one together as beautifully as Lori did!! THANK YOU LORI !!!!!!  Sela & Sloane have been so excited!  We set everything up as soon as we got home...and the sweet gifts you sent are still wrapped-and that is driving them both nuts!! I keep teasing them and telling them the presents are for me and daddy!! ;) I will let them open some soon enough, but I love to see them squirm about it!! :)  There will never be enough words I could say to thank you both for the kindess you showed-we love you Aunt Kel and Lori Humphrey and pray your Christmas is blessed more than ever.....

Today Marcus will get an MRI of his brain...standard before treatment begins-he hasn't had one of the brain since June...and he will start his chemo cocktail on Monday....after last night's prayers at Golden Triangle Church on the Rock, I have no stress about next week at all.  I know that God will get Marcus through it and He will heal him....end of discussion.  We will no longer read things online, or listen to discouraging news, because we know the Creator of Heaven and Earth is in total control-and we are giving it all to HIM!  We love you all!!!

"Worship the LORD your God, and his blessing will be on your food and water. I will take away sickness from among you, and none will miscarry or be barren in your land. I will give you a full life span." Exodus 23:25-26

There are no words I can say to truly express my gratitude to Pastor Ron, the staff and congregation of Golden Triangle Church on the Rock. At tonight's service, you all sacrificed hearing Pastor Ron deliver a sermon to you-and instead gave your prayers to my husband Marcus and our family. Thank you and bless you all. Marcus needed every hand that touched him and every prayer prayed for him-more than you will ever know.

I have believed from the start that God will heal Marcus. I have told him that it may not happen quickly, but he will receive his healing-and once he does-he will have the most awesome testimony to deliver to people everywhere. I truly believe that his healing/testimony will bring people to Jesus that would never have come to Jesus-people that have strayed will return-and I am patiently waiting for that healing-patiently waiting to hear Marcus deliver his awesome testimony of faith, courage, healing, and complete trust in God. I will continue to pray, trust and give my entire life over to the Lord and let Him lead me and my family every step of this journey.

Marcus may have been diagnosed with Stage IV Metastatic Melanoma....but the Lord will take away the sickness and give him a full life span-in Jesus' name!!!

We will praise you in our storm......

So today we heard some good news and some not so good news. Good news: there are no new mets in Marcus' liver, spleen, pancreas, etc...THANK YOU JESUS!!! Not so good news: the tumors in his lungs have grown and do not appear to be responding to IL-2.

So, Dr. Kim has suggested he begin a chemo cocktail called CVD (Cisplatin, Vinblastine, & Dacarbazine)......he can possibly do this locally with Dr. Lavalais (Marcus loves her and hopes she will take this on) if she feels comfortable with it. If not, we will go to MD Anderson to get this treatment. He will go 4 days-all outpatient, have treatments for about 4 hrs each day, then get 17 day break, repeat 4 days, then 17 day break, then scan again. In the meantime, they are going to try again for BRAF testing on the cells from his biopsy in Sept..and see if they can test the cells from the fluid they removed from his lung over the weekend.

Some of you may be disappointed and feel your prayers are not working-please do not feel this way. We know that God is in control and we are waiting patiently for Him to heal Marcus-and we will continue to "praise Him in this storm"-our faith is not shaken-and we pray neither is yours. Marcus and I have felt drawn to Jesus, more than ever and we are ready to battle! So the devil better get ready-we are not letting this slow us down!

If Dr. Lavalais is on board, Marcus could start this treatment by wed or thurs-so we need all prayers to continue-this treatment is 3 different chemos all at once and it will be rough...but Marcus is ready-willing to do whatever God offers him to fight this monster called Melanoma.

So please watch/listen to the video above and do not let the devil shake your faith-Marcus isn't, and neither am I.....So stand strong with us and PRAY, PRAY, PRAY!!!!!

We love you all so very much and thank you for all the text messages, emails and phone calls to check on us!!!

Home, but not for long

well, we spent black friday in the ER at MD Anderson...not our first choice of places to be-but, Marcus was really feeling short of breath and called Dr. Kim-and of course he wanted him to come in-and i am SO thankful that Marcus agreed-he ended up having pleural effusion and they had to remove 1900ml (half gallon) of fluid from his pleural cavity!!!! i told him i didn't even see how he could breathe at all !!! anyways, good news is, since they saw he was already scheduled for CT today, they would do it all then...so about midnight friday, he got the full CT of chest/abdomen/pelvis! of course, the ER drs would not give us any insight-they want us to wait and get the word from Dr. Kim today....so today we will visit MD Anderson again and see what's going on-we are still faithfully believing that God will heal Marcus and we will not accept any bad news today! we are patiently waiting, trusting God and know in our hearts that Marcus will get through this-it is just a little mountain he has to ask God to move for him-but not impossible-nothing is impossible through Christ!!

if tumors are responding, Marcus will admit for another round of IL-2...if not, he will discuss with Dr. Kim a new plan of attack! he is NOT giving up and will NOT let melanoma win! so all you faithful prayer warriors, keep praying!!!! we love you all and thank you for your continued support of our little family. more posts to come.....

Walk by Faith-everyday

You know, living in our 5th wheel has been very interesting-some days I feel like screaming, some days crying-then other days I truly feel that we are blessed beyond words. The closeness we have felt over the past month is amazing-although I will admit, sometimes Marcus has to remind me-but we have been a closer family because of our surroundings-we have no other choice ;) But seriously, we know that this is situation is temporary, and God is working all around us, getting things in order(mainly healing Marcus by making those tumors go away!)-we just have to "Walk by Faith", even when we cannot see!! Sometimes the world (or the devil) makes it easy to get distracted or frustrated about our lives or situations-we are always so impatient and want things done our way-NOW! I admit that I am like that A LOT-but I try very hard to let go of those feelings and I pray for God to get me through with patience. I know for years the devil really worked on me and made me believe that because of my past mistakes or my genetics, I would one day, eventually, go down a path of destruction and there was nothing I could do about it.....THANK YOU LORD for showing me that this is NOT true!!! Jesus has already paid for our sins-done-we are forgiven! All we have to learn is that we must repent, ask Jesus to come into our hearts and lives-and live our lives the way He wants us to-bottom line. The devil cannot win that war-unless we let him-so I decided a long time ago that God would win me-NOT the devil!! And every day I truly "Walk by Faith" and pray for guidance-won't you join me????

Please watch the Jeremy Camp video attached-he is very talented and I have not found a song that I didn't like from him-he is truly blessed with a unique way to get the message and word of God out to people through his music. Thank you Jeremy Camp for following through with the path God has for you!!!

TOTALLY THANKFUL

 

So, we have been home a few days now and trying to get back to normal life-whatever that is ;) Marcus is doing good-still pretty tired and coughing some-but he is just trying to enjoy every second he has home-before we go back nov. 30 for another week of IL-2. Things are going well with the girls, but it is still a struggle to get Sela to discuss her feelings-her teachers told me today that she had a rough day today-and I talked to her this afternoon-she is just so worried about her daddy. Marcus and I will talk to her again together, but I simply reassured her that God is in control and we just have to pray for strength and peace to accept whatever comes. Her main worry is about losing her daddy. Which I completely understand, because of course, that is my main worry too. But I explained to her how I pray daily (sometimes several times a day) for God to grant me the strength to get through all this and the peace to accept whatever happens-even if that means God needs daddy in heaven more than we need daddy down here. I explained to her that God doesn't always answer our prayers the way we pray them, but He always has a plan and He will always take care of us. No matter what, we will be ok. Sounds like I have it all together, huh? NOT REALLY-you should have seen me saturday when I had a mini-meltdown on the way home! BUT, it doesn't mean I don't completely trust God in His plan-because I do-I just keep prayin for the strength to accept whatever plan that is. And, like I told Sela, none of us is guaranteed one second on earth. We all need to enjoy each other and the time we have because cancer, or no cancer, we could all be gone from here tomorrow. I am so thankful for my sweet girls. God truly blessed us with some angels. So I am attaching a few shots of Sela & Sloane from this afternoon, being silly girls, like normal! Thank you God for letting me enjoy them on earth-however long that is....

Ready to go!!

Marcus is feeling MUCH better.  He hardly slept last night, so this morning he felt bad.  But got him a nap and we walked around more and he is better.  He just ate supper and is ready to go home!! Dr says he can tomorrow as long as he continues to lose the fluid and his levels stay good-and so far so good!  We are so ready!!  Thank you all for your continued prayers-we appreciate them so much!!!

What faith can do

Click and enjoy!

This morning has been rough. Marcus had 6th dose at 2am and all was well until 4am. Nurse came in to get vitals and made him stand up for weight check. Afterwards-everything went downhill fast!! All at once chills/rigors started and at the same time he got nauseaous-vomitted and nose started bleeding-BAD scene in room P1004. He has totally had enough! Says when doc comes in this morning he is telling her he is done-that last dose really worked him
over. This whole round over all hasn't been too bad, but his swelling started sooner
and it just seems his body is done.He is finally peacefully resting-thank God. So I decided to share the video above because it helped me so much this morning. Real hard to see the man you love suffer like this. But I know God is working-I have complete and total FAITH!

Moving all the while

5th dose down! Marcus had 5th dose of IL-2 around 6:30 and as of 8 no chills/rigors.  
He even ate supper and is watching
the world series now-he is super swollen with 
all the fluids and feels like crap-but he is hanging on and not 
complaining one bit! He is such a fighter-I admire his strength 
so much. So next dose scheduled for 2am-then see doc in morning-
and will let him know if he'll go more-or not-keep the prayers coming!!!!!
So far they have helped him so much-so please don't stop!! God is "Moving all the while"-listen to this song by sidewalk prophets and u will know what I mean ;). Love u all!!!!

Restin and rocking along!

Sorry I have been bad about posting today-BUT it is only because we have nothing to post-THANK GOD-Marcus has been resting all day after his 1st dose this morning around 9:40-he will receive his 2nd dose about 6pm.  Just need tons of prayers-we know the tumors aren't gone yet-BUT- they WILL be soon because God is running this show-not IL-2, not the docs and not MD Anderson-ONLY God has the power to heal-and we are patiently waiting for Him to do His great work!!!!!!!  We love u all and thank u so much for every prayer u send our way! 

Happy-but not

Well we are finally settled in our room-thank you Lord for getting us into P1004 and not ICU!!!!! Tonight Marcus will get fluids and antibiotics but won't start treatments until tomorrow morning. We met with Dr. Kim today and found out some news that fustrated us a little-Dr. Kim wants him to do 4 rounds of IL-2 no matter what. We are scheduled to come back Nov 30 for scans and then admit again for 3rd round-then, even if tumors are
gone, he still wants him to come back for 4th round-if tumors are not gone, but responding, then he will go 6 rounds. We totally misunderstood all his before-but now we know the full game plan-4 rounds of IL-2 no matter what-possibly 6! We were so happy to get this room-but then not when we found out about the additional treatments-BUT Marcus says he will do whatever it takes to get all this melanoma out of his lungs!!!! So keep the prayers coming prayer warriors-Marcus needs them!!!!!!!!

PSALMS 40:1

"I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to me and heard my cry."  Psalms 40:1

So today we were scheduled to be at MD Anderson and Marcus would have already received a dose of IL-2; BUT, when we were there yesterday, they didn't like the way his PICC line looked-said it showed signs of infection-so they had it removed, swabbed to find out what type of infection and started him on antibiotics.  So, now we are scheduled to come back 11-2-09 to start Round 2-a week delay-but we are not discouraged-we are being patient.  We know that God is bigger than this infection and cancer and He will get us through this.  
Marcus was a little disappointed-he was ready to get this mess over with-but understands that the doctors just don't want any infection before they start the IL-2-they need him to be healthy and ready to fight!  So we are counting this extra week home as a blessing and trusting God with the rest!!!!!
Thank you to all you faithful prayer warriors out there-we truly appreciate every prayer sent to our family-we are blessed-and so grateful-we love you all!!!

1 Timothy 6:8

"But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that."  1 Timothy 6:8



So this morning I am awaken to another blessed day living in our 5th wheel!  We are finally settled and we are pretending we are on a permanent camping trip!  It has been amazing to see all the JUNK we have accumulated over the past 10 years and now have in storage.  Ridiculous is really the best word to describe it.  There is NO way that we need any of that-and we have realized now, that we have taken for granted the simple things in life-and like most people, have filled our home and minds with useless material items.  So as we begin this new chapter in our lives, we are starting our journey with a new declutter ritual and mindset.  We will not bring useless items into our home that we do not need.  We will learn to enjoy each other and what we have and be grateful for it all.  And like the scripture above says, we will be content with that.  


Eventually, after Marcus is done with treatments and on the recovery track (I am expecting God to heal him completely), we will find ourselves either building or buying a new home.  But we have committed to continuing this new lifestyle in a new home as well.  Not only for ourselves, but for our girls.  They need this example to see that material items may only bring you joy for a moment, but it is the simple things in life that will keep the joy in your heart for a lifetime.

Life is good for us-and we thank God for every second.

Sidewalk Prophets – Christian, Pop, Rock – The Words I Would Say

Just wanted to share and thank Aunt Kel and Carrie St. Cyr for sharing with me!!!


Sidewalk Prophets – Christian, Pop, Rock – The Words I Would Say

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Marcus-"Mighty Warrior"!!

So today was filled with lots of packing-thank you all the family that came by to help: Mom & Dad Stanley, Mom & Pop Dubois, Granny & PawPaw Viator, Shannon, Ben, Amy-and thank you Aunt Kel for lunch!!!! While I was packing I ran across a little wallet card that I must have bought Marcus a long time ago (we have been in this house for 10 yrs so you can only imagine the treasures I found today!) and the card read like this:


Marcus
"Mighty Warrior"
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:9

Nothing more to say really, except, WOW-our God is an awesome God!!! I have attached a pic of Marcus on his b-day-he is holding the little frame the girls and I made for him to give him inspiration while he is taking his treatments!!!!


We love you baby! Keep fighting!!!!!

Calling all house packing party people!!

You are invited!  House packing party starting Wednesday! Please report to supervisor Marcus Stanley and he will give u instructions then sit back and watch u work ;) 

So I will be starting to pack a few things myself tomorrow-but Wednesday I am requesting any available help -all u folks that kept offering-I am holding u to ur word ;). Since Marcus can't do any of the work, he says he will gladly supervise this operation!! ;) So please make sure ur ready before u come on over ;) lol! 

Things are going well-Marcus is feeling better but not 100%-Although u would not know it-he hasn't complained one second-he is enjoying every second he has with his girls-thank u Lord!  

It was so sweet tonight at the dinner table, Sela said grace and she asked God to please make daddy's melanoma go away forever-I know God was listening to her sweet voice and believe He will-Marcus will be healed-we just have to believe and trust the Lord and we do!!!


 

trying to get moving......

so we got home yesterday afternoon and we couldn't have been happier!!! we spent the afternoon/evening at the in-laws, eating gumbo and visiting...then picking up our girls. it was such a relief to finally be home and out of MD Anderson....if we never had to set foot there again, i would be happy. BUT, we will be going back, Oct. 26 for round 2, SO, i am praying for strength-i need it bad!!!!

today has been slow going-trying to get things back in order and getting ready to get the house packed up-gotta be out by oct. 19-so strange how things happen....but we are trusting that God has a plan and we will eventually end up wherever we are supposed to be. :) until then, we will just be pretending like we are camping in our 5th wheel ;) so please pray for ALL of us, because we are gonna really give the words "tight knit family" a whole new meaning ;)

anyways, just wanted to let everyone know we made it home and we are so grateful for all your continued prayers and support. we are amazed more and more everyday the people that God has sent to us-to fill every need. thank u Lord-thank you family-thank you friends-we love you all!

One day closer to home!!!!

So now we are in a regular room-hopefully going home tomorrow-Marcus' electrolytes were low and dr didn't want him going home until everything returned to normal.  

We were so glad to get to new room-had enough of ICU-we are prayin we can come here next time and not ICU-gonna ask/beg dr ;)

Marcus is doing great-back to his old self-just bored and ready to go!!!  He is feeling good-not really excited about coming back oct 26 !

Thank u all for your contined prayers and support-they have helped us oh so much on this first round!!!!  Love u all!

Good Friday morning!!

Sitting in waiting room until they let me back in around 8-slept pretty well from about 12-6, then I was politely awaken and told I had to leave for shift change :(.  Marcus seems to be doing a little better-electrolytes are down-not sure what they will do but hope it doesn't delay him going home saturday.  I have to go to a cath. Class today to learn how to take care of cath in his arm-he has to keep it in until next treatment.  
Met a wonderful lady named Tammy-her little brother is in room next to Marcus-he is 34 and just discovered 2wks ago he has cancer-it is all in his lungs, but they are still trying to determine what type of cancer-he went to another hospital first-they biopsied a mass -but didn't have the proper tools and the wound became infected-he came to mda Monday - please help me pray for this family-they are going through some hard times-the unknown-until they determine what type of cancer they don't know how to treat.  Ms. Tammy was great to talk to-she feels the same as I do - we are all gonna get through this and have a great testimony after about how great our God is!!!

Round one-DONE!!!

Dr just left and confirmed dose 7 was the last one for this round-she says she wants him to come back for second round so she's kicking him out on Saturday :)  she said he has had enough-7 doses @ 80 million units-and his body is showing the signs-fever even with Tylenol & naproxen, swelling, decrease in potassium and calcium... All these things tell her he has had enough on this round-she called it the warm up round!  Anyways, hopefully tomorrow he will be moved to a regular room and get to leave sometime Saturday-not sure what time yet... Thank u all so very much for your continued prayers and support-we love u all!

7th dose complete!

Marcus was finally able to take his 7th dose of IL-2 around 1:30pm and finished about 1:45pm.  They had to give him potassium and calcium this time in IV.  Dr days this may be his last dose-just have to see how this 7th one goes-even if this is the last one, he will still have to be here at least 2 more days. Hopefully not in ICU but I don't know yet. He is so ready to be done-sad thing because he knows he has to come back for round 2 oct. 26-but he is ready for the break-and I am ready to see him unconnected to IVs.  Keep praying please-we need it!  Love u all!

Leviticus 14:7 -Seven is a great number to finish on!!

"Seven times he shall sprinkle the one to be cleansed of the infectious disease and pronounce him clean..." Leviticus 14:7

Dr came in about 20mins ago-Marcus is really feeling bad-he is achy, skin is tight and he's just tired.  He hasn't urinated since 3am-they measure intake/output very closely- and he can't get another dose until he does-he just ate a little breakfast and drank several glasses of water, but still doesn't feel the need to go.  So dr says he won't get a dose at 10am-may get one this afternoon-but she wants him to at least get that 7th dose before he calls is quits.  He is getting 80 million units per dose.  It is really taking a toll on him.  I told him 7 was a great number to finish on!!  So we are praying he will be able to handle at least that 7th dose and then let God finish the rest!! Keep prayers coming please!!  Thank u-we love u all! 

Ok Marcus' 5th dose at 6:30 pm yesterday was chills/rigors free until about 10:30pm then a few came on-not bad but some.  His 6th dose didn't come until 3:30am not sure of the hold up-anyways he was good until 6am-chills/rigors and this time some vomiting-not much-he doesn't have anything on his stomach-only ate a few bites of supper last night-but he just feels horrible.  The swelling is starting to occur-mainly in his face-ears, eyes, lips-normal with IL-2 so we expected this.  Nurses let me stay until 6:30am (I normally have to leave ICU from 6-8 every morning and evening for shift change) but they let me stay until meds had time to work and he was resting.  It hurts my heart to see him have to go through this-I love him so much and don't like to see him suffer.  I told him again his morning-when he feels he has had enough, tell them and I will take him home-but he says he wants to keep going as long as he can- his goal is to take all 14 doses (I think it is 14) but if he can't I just pray that God picks up where the IL-2 stops.  Keep praying-love u all.

Prayers-keep sending them to Houston!! ;)

Prayers are working so keep them coming please! Marcus had 4th dose @10am and so far no chills/rigors this time!!! He is sleeping now and i just know that God has His hands around Marcus. There is no other explanation-all the prayer he is receiving is getting him through this with the least amount of side effects and I am so grateful. Thank you Lord!!!

His calcium was a little low on last labs, so they gave him some calcium via IV-but this is normal.  He is doing so well and I am so proud of him-so proud to be his wife!!!  Next dose around 6-6:30pm-so keep praying prayer warriors!  We love u all and we are so very grateful to have u all with us in this fight!!!!


His second and third doses seem to have been he worst so far-horrible chills/rigors about 2 hours after he received IL-2. But he went through this with interferon-and without any meds (he refused-never wanted to take anything)-but this time since he is in the ICU they give him meds immediatley when symptoms occur-has really helped him. I am just praying those rough side effects stay behind us and he gets through the rest easily!! Love u all!!

Great start

So far so good! Marcus finished his first dose of IL-2 around 10:30am and will receive his second dose at 6:30pm. At this point he has not had any side effects and is doing great-he is resting now until his next dose. He was feeling so good earlier he got up and walked around-he hates being stuck in the bed. But I just keep reminding him that he needs to take this time and relax, accept the treatment and concentrate on getting this melanoma out of his lungs!!! He agrees-we just keep asking God for strength and thanking Him for what we have received so far! No side effects at all up to this point! The drs really act like they are shocked and keep asking "are you sure you don't have shortness of breath, chest pain, etc?". I told Marcus they just don't understand the power of prayer!! All those
mighty prayer warriors out there-thank you-we know without those prayers-Marcus would not be doing as well as he is!!!! So keep them prayers coming!!!! :) don't stop now !! If he keeps doing well after his second dose, he will receive another at 2am. At this point we don't know how many more-he has 15 doses reserved for him-but they only keep giving as long as he keeps doing well,so I will keep you all posted. I am also posting updates on facebook, so if we aren't friends yet, send me an invite and you can get more updates!

Thank you again to everyone that came out to eat Saturday night for Marcus' 35th
bday and for everyone that came to Church on the Rock Sunday to join us and the elders of the church prayin over him. I feel this prayer was so powerful -not only for
Marcus but for everyone there! God brought us all together and I thank Him so much!! And thank you Cynthia Miller for arranging that for
Marcus-you and Byron are true blessings to us-thank you, thank you so very much!!!

Jesus already did it!!

Today has been a long day!! We are finally admitted and I am going through the scripture confessions book my friend Carrie let me borrow-and I found a chapter discussing Matthew 8:17 that declares Jesus Himself bore our sickness and diseases-so we don't have to!! And also Isaiah 53:5 that states by His stripes we are healed !! So that is what we are standing on today and believing that God will get Marcus through this and heal him!! Dr. Kim said the CT of his chest from Thursday showed growth in the tumors-so we gotta get this fight started!!!

On another note-today marks our 18th yr together as a couple!! It was October 5, 1991 that we went to our junior yr homecoming-and we've been together ever since!!

Thank you again to all the friends and family that have continued to pray for our family-we are forever grateful for your support!!

I will post again as soon as I can-love u all!!

What does Melanoma look like?

So often Marcus gets asked about how his journey began.  Most people are shocked when we tell them this all started with a mole he was born with.  I am attaching some pics from prior to his first biopsy at the dermatologist-click on the pic and zoom in to get a better view (I have inserted a big arrow pointing to the mole), and 2 after that biopsy, but before his wide excision at MD Anderson that removed the margin around the mole and rebuilt his thumb with a skin graft from his side.  Maybe this will give some folks a little better idea about how it looked....crazy to think that Melanoma can start as a simple mole, then travel to lymph nodes and now lungs...amazing.....we have to be aware and teach others how to do skin exams.  We don't want to see anyone else have to go through this.  Prevention and early detection are the keys.  Please spread the word.

keepin our heads up and smiles on our faces!!!-Marcus scheduled to start IL-2

well, yesterday we met with dr. kim to discuss the plan of action!  marcus has to go back thursday to do several more baseline tests, before he will be admitted into the hospital for 7 days-starting Oct. 5 to begin his 1st round of IL-2.  he has to make sure his heart and lungs are strong enough (doing stress tests and pulmonary test) and then another CT of the chest to have the most recent images of the tumors in his lungs.  he will be admitted monday after they insert a catheter into his chest for easier dosing.  he will begin the IL-2 treatments around 9am tuesday morning and they will give him up to 3 doses a day for 5 days, or until his body cannot handle it anymore.  that is why he has to stay admitted, so they can monitor his heart and all other organs-they will constantly being doing blood tests and checking on everything.  if anything starts to go south, they will reduce or stop the treatments.  he has to stay in the hospital 2 days after his last dose is administered, so they can make sure he is recovering properly-hence the 7 day admission.  then after he is released, he will get about a 14 day break and start back again Oct. 26-for 7 more days.  after that 2nd round, they will redo all the scans again and see if there is change (stable, shrinkage of tumors, growth, etc)...if it seems to be working, either by stabilizing or shrinking, they will schedule him for a 3rd and final round....if it is not working, then they will go back to the results from the gene mutations tests (they are actually testing for 3-B-RAF, C-KIT and NRAIS)-please excuse me if i labeled those wrong, i haven't researched the other 2 mutations, i only knew about the B-RAF.....and look into clinical trials...pretty much every trial marcus looked into that he was interested in, required him to at least have tried the IL-2 first...so he was ready to get this under his belt.  but we are praying and trusting that God will heal him with IL-2 and we won't even have to look at those trials!!!!!


meanwhile, we are trying to get everything in line for us to be gone for 7 days...thank God for my mother-in-law Debbie who will be taking care of the girls for us !!  this makes me less stressed and more capable of taking care of marcus while he goes through this....we have discussed with the girls what daddy has to go do, and i guess in their own ways they understand.  i just pray this works and we don't have to deal with this anymore!!  i know marcus is ready to be DONE with melanoma!!!!!

so, as you see in the picture of us from last week's lamar lady cards soccer game-we are keeping smiles on our faces-we know God has a plan for our lives and we are holding on strong and following His great lead!  we believe that God is the only one that can get marcus through this rough treatment and heal him-and we expect nothing less.

and as gary allan sings it, "life ain't always beautiful, but it's a beautiful ride"

thank you all for your continued prayers and support-we love you all!!

butter nose!!

Happy 9th B-day Sela Kaye!! In our house, there is a tradition-passed down from my mom's family-to butter the nose of the b-day person to wake them up!! I used to hate this tradition and really didn't want to pass it down-but when Sela was younger-she LOVED the idea and begged me to continue it! So here is my butter nose Sela this morning immediately after daddy put the butter on her nose!! I can't believe she is 9 years old!! Little moments like this one, remind me of how we need to truly cherish every second.

Finally home!!

I have attached a you tube video that I would like to share...as I was waiting the past few days for Marcus, I have been searching for new christian artists on iTunes and I found Jeremy Camp's music-I quickly realized I needed to buy his album!!  I LOVE the songs in this video and had to share-plus the messages and scriptures included are awesome!


So, to update you all-the brain ct and abdomen/pelvis ct came back ALL CLEAR!  THANK THE LORD!  The biopsy did confirm Melanoma in the lungs-so at least now we know for sure what we are dealing with.  Dr. Kim is having cells from the original biopsy done last year tested for a gene mutation-V600E B-raf-if he tests positive for this mutation, they are suggesting he get into a clinical trial that includes AZD6244 and Dacarbazine.  Sucky part is, this is a double blinded study-so 50% of patients will get the AZD6244 plus Dacarbazine and the other 50% will get Decarbazine and placebo :( We are not really thrilled with this option-since Dr. Kim said Dacarbazine is a standard chemo that he would offer if Marcus was 80 yrs old and in poor health-not the 1st choice for a young 35 yr old man in otherwise great health- SOOOOO, at this point we have to wait to see if he even tests positive for the gene mutation-if not, then our next option is IL-2-with a possible combo of Dacarbazine to it....


In the meantime, we are asking for more prayers-none of these options have great statistics for cure-but we believe that God will work with those numbers for us :) BUT we need your help with prayers-please don't stop-keep them coming :)


Marcus is also looking into trying to create a more alkaline based diet-there is tons of research to support the fact that cancer thrives in more acidic atmospheres, so the theory is to create a more alkaline atmosphere in your body to help fight this-so if anyone has info that may help, please email me.  I am currently following the blog of another Melanoma warrior-who is currently in Mexico, at a Gerson clinic-I am praying he has good results to help us :) check him out on my blog list-he is under sMelanoma....


thank you all again for your continued prayers and support-it feels so good to be home and we know we are truly blessed to have all of you in our lives-thank you so very much!


marcus & mindy

Mighty to save

****DISCLAIMER: I AM NOT YELLING MY POST-MY IPHONE IS GIVING ME TROUBLE-I CAN ONLY POST IN ALL CAPS OR THE  CRAZY UPPER/LOWERCASE COMBO-SO I DECIDED CAPS WAS BEST :)****


I HAVE HAD THE SONG "MIGHTY TO SAVE" BY HILLSONG IN MY HEAD SINCE SUNDAY AT CHURCH-IF YOU HAVE NEVER HEARD IT-I ATTACHED THE YOU TUBE VIDEO LIVE VERSION WITH LYRICS-ANYWAYS THAT SONG HAS HELPED ME SO MUCH OVER THE PAST FEW DAYS-I AM SO GRATEFUL.....


SO THE BIOPSY WENT GREAT YESTERDAY-NO COMPLICATIONS-THANK THE LORD-WE LEFT MD ANDERSON AROUND 4PM THEN WENT TO GET A BITE TO EAT AT A LITTLE MEXICAN RESTAURANT-THANKS TO APRIL-SHE BROUGHT MARCUS BACK FOR HIS XRAYS AND GAVE US PERFECT DIRECTIONS :)  ANYWAYS WE WENT BACK TO HOTEL SO HE COULD REST-AND ALL WAS WELL UNTIL ABOUT 2AM-HE WOKE UP IN A LOT OF PAIN AND HAD TO SIT IN THE CHAIR FOR ABOUT AN HOUR-I PROPPED HIS HEAD AND FEET UP AND HE SEEMED TO GET SOME RELIEF-I LAYED IN THE COUCH BESIDE HIM UNTIL HE FELT BETTER AND WANTED TO GO BACK TO THE BED.  THERE HE RESTED WELL UNTIL ABOUT 10AM-HE IS STILL A LITTLE SORE BUT IS DOING REALLY WELL-HE IS SO STRONG AND I ADMIRE HIM SO VERY MUCH.  THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR CONTINUED PRAYERS-WE APPRECIATE THEM SO MUCH! TOMORROW IS ANOTHER LONG DAY AT MDA-BRAIN CT, LABS AND MEET DR. KIM-THEY TOLD US YESTERDAY THAT IT WILL TAKE 3-5 BUSINESS DAYS TO GET THE BIOPSY RESULTS, SO WE MAY ONLY HAVE PRELIM RESULTS TOMORROW-BUT WE FOR SURE FIND OUT RESULTS FROM THE CT OF ABDOMEN/PELVIS AND BRAIN TOMORROW-SO I WILL KEEP YOU ALL POSTED.  UNTIL THEN-WE LOVE Y'ALL!!!    MARCUS & MINDY

Worry about nothing, pray about everything!!

so today was a wonderful day. starting off with an awesome soccer game, where sela scored 2 out of the 3 of the goals for her team!! then to a b-day party for our sweet nephew-all the while thinking about the scans yesterday and what next week holds. biopsy on tues, ct of brain on thurs....then meet with dr. kim to discuss everything-results, and discussion of when to start treatment. although it seems hard to not worry-i am trying, very hard, not to worry anymore. i have decided and realized, i have got to quit wasting the time i have now on earth worrying. when i worry, i am taking away my happiness from today-so what is the point of that? i have decided to give it all to God-really, give it all to God-and enjoy every second i have on this earth-every second i have with marcus, every second i have with sela & sloane. i will not let melanoma rule my thoughts or mood-melanoma is going to lose this fight-not marcus-and that is all i will think anymore.


so tomorrow we will go to church and thank God for every second He has given us-and we will ask Him to continue giving His grace so we can make it through each and everyday. i thank all our family and friends for their continued prayers, emails, calls and text messages. i feel so blessed and don't know how i would be holding up if i didn't have all of you. thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart.


so join me now-let's worry about NOTHING, and pray about EVERYTHING!! :) that is what God wants us to do-He wants us to trust in Him-and He will take care of everything!!!

Labs, scans-how much can one man take?!?!?

well, today we met with dr. kim. he wants to have another ct done of marcus' abdomen/pelvis and brain, another x-ray and more labs done tomorrow! so back to hst we go!! after all those scans are complete-and confirmed that there is not any other mets (not doing the ct of brain until sept 17) then dr. kim will schedule a needle biopsy of one of the nodules to confirm we are dealing with melanoma and not another form of cancer-THEN he will schedule marcus to begin IL-2.....he said as long as marcus begins those treatments within a month, he should be good-he just doesn't want to wait 3-4 months because of the growth of the nodules over the previous 2 months-but he said a few weeks time would not make a huge difference-i am praying he is right! there are of course other options (trials and other meds) but dr. kim wants those to be left open after we see what the IL-2 does-i am praying we won't even have to go there, because i am believing that God will heal marcus with these IL-2 treatments, and we will leave melanoma in the dust!!!!!!

now the IL-2 won't be a picnic-it is given in dosages over a 5-6 day period-pretty much until your body can't handle anymore-then you get a break for a few days, then you go at it again!! marcus is ready to fight-we are just praying that he only has to go a few rounds and he will be a complete responder! so keep your prayers coming so we can fight his monster!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thank you to all of you that have emailed or texted us to check on things-we are so loved and we truly appreciate all your prayers and thoughts and words of encouragement. we know that everyone follows a different path in this fight, but we also know that our path would not be what it has been if it weren't for the love and support of family and friends! thank you all so very much!!

as soon as we get more news i will post again-but for now...we are in lab/scan limbo :)

love, mindy

MELANOMA TRULY SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i don't like to use the word hate, but right now, i HATE melanoma. with a passion. marcus went back to MD yesterday for repeat scans-in june they found 2 new spots in his lungs that were 5mm in size-but they weren't sure it was melanoma and wanted to do repeat scans yesterday to compare. well, now there are at least 4 nodules-12-15mm in size.....surgery is not an option because they are in both lungs and scattered. we go back sept 10 to discuss treatment with dr. kim-it will probably be a combination of chemos, vaccines, trials, we aren't quite sure yet.


marcus and i are both in shock. we just knew that the spots were some type of inflammation and would be gone. we were floored with the news. he truly needs every prayer he can get...he is so strong and is ready to fight this monster with all he has-and i am behind him 200%.....

Back to School!!!

This morning my first baby went back to school!! Sela is now in 3rd grade and I can't believe it! She decided she wanted to ride the bus this year, so we rode down to the bus stop on the golf cart and waited! She was so excited, but a little nervous, and so was momma :) Hope you enjoy the images above-they make me wanna cry :)

3 of the best reasons to wake up each morning :)

above is a pic of marcus, sela & sloane from our recent trip to moody gardens. the girls had so much fun-and i think marcus and i had as much fun as they did :) family time is very important, but with the business of life-sometimes just taking one full day to do something fun with just the four of us is difficult to plan!! i captured this image in the rainforest pyramid-which the kids did not enjoy as much as the aquarium pyramind-mainly because they couldn't touch anything and had to read ;) anyways, just wanted to share this shot-it makes me smile from ear to ear and makes me appreciate what God has blessed me with-a wonderful, loving husband and 2 beautiful, sweet daughters. what more could i ever ask for?

give me serenity

i have this prayer on my keychain, on my bible cover, on my cell phone wallpaper-no matter what font or pretty decorations/pictures are used to re-create it, it is a prayer i will always hold dear to my heart-yes it is simple, but so powerful. marcus recently went for some routine tests, and still has to have a brain mri before all the drs. can say he remains cancer free.....the wait, doubt, fear, consumes me on most days. i want him to be healthy-i believe that is what God wants too-but then i go to mpip.org and see so many stories of fellow melanoma warriors that felt the same way-but eventually lost the fight. today i am just asking God to give me serenity-to get through the wait-the doubt-the fear-and enjoy everyday we have-i know none of us is guaranteed a second on this earth-thank you all for your continued prayers for our family and for marcus....i love you all so very much!

Life & Death-Accepting Fate

the recent passing of Tara Swanson has stirred up emotions in me that i have not felt since marcus was first diagnosed. melanoma sucks! she was our age, she was a mother, a wife, a vibrant woman that had so much life to live....it just doesn't seem fair. it brings me back to when one of my bosses, darla estrello lost her young life to cancer. she had 3 beautiful children and i remember thinking-how can this happen? how can God take her away from her little girl? then i realized for whatever reasons unknown to me, God needed darla in heaven, more than she was needed on earth. that is a hard pill to swallow for lots of people-especially if you don't believe in God-but i do and know that i must accept the fate he has for me, marcus, our girls, our family, our lives. i must trust in Him-and i do-fully trust in God-but it still hurts sometimes, and it still scares the crap out of me.

marcus is so strong-when i discussed my fears, concerns with him after learning of tara passing-he told me, "you need to accept it now-if i am going to die, i am going to die-life will go on" how can he sit there and say that so matter of factly to me? is he trying to protect me? is he just that strong? the answer really is, he truly knows that God is in control. his faith has always been strong like a rock-through our struggles early on in our marriage-he always told me that God was the only reason we were still together. he knew that without God-we would have never made it. marcus has accepted his fate-he has peace knowing that God is in control-not melanoma-so today, i will accept fate too. i am making a decision to not dwell on the "what ifs" but to live life to the fullest......trusting in God.

pray it is really over!!

well, yesterday marcus made the decision not to resume his interferon shots. he has not been able to take them for 7 weeks now because his liver enzymes still have not returned to normal. they have come down-but not normal. he is going to have his primary care phys. run further tests to make sure all is well with the liver. after meeting with dr. lavalais, he decided and she supported him-to stop the treatment. as most of you know, the drs at md anderson already told him that there wasn't any scientific data that proved anything more than the first month of high dose actually did anything further to prevent it from coming back. SOOO, after much prayer and discussion, he is done. he says he is now ready to get his life back to normal...get back to doing things with the girls, me, getting our family back into a healthy mind frame.....out of the dreary cloud that melanoma brings over us all. and we are ready too! i told him months ago, that whenever he felt he had enough and wanted to stop-i was behind him 100%....so now he has decided. all we can do from here is pray, pray, pray melanoma stays away-and continue seeing his drs at md anderson every 4-6 months as recommended....and we will do all that!
with that being said, this may be the last post for awhile...you can always see the latest at my other blog (www.momentsbymindy.blogspot.com) but as far as updates with melanoma....this wife is taking a break :) i would be just fine if i never had to hear/say the word again!!!

we love you all and thank you again for your continued prayers and support!!!

liver enzymes-what makes you rise?

well, monday we went back to md anderson for marcus' regular 4-6 month ck up with dr. lee and to get labs/x-rays done....dr. lee said everything looked fine and they would call if anything came back abnormal in labs or x-rays-and told marcus to continue interferon when he could and come back in 4 months!! then he went to get labs done locally to see how is liver enzymes are doing..dr. lavalais will not let him resume his interferon shots until the levels are back to normal....so please tell me how in the world they could have gone up??? he hasn't had any interferon in almost 6 weeks?!?!?! well, they did, so, no shots this week. he will not want to start them back when it is time!! he is loving the way he feels and doesn't even want to think about how he will feel when he gets that first shot!!!

on another note, sela and i went to have our moles checked yesterday. we have been having the appt scheduled since summer and just now got in. everything looked fine, except for one mole on her back (the mole that prompted me to make the appt in the first place) is darker in the middle than on the edges, so dr. marchand wants me to monitor. but everything else looks fine on both of us. now i just need to make an appt for sloane. she only has a few moles on her little body, but there is one on her scalp, right above her ear that looks like marcus' did years ago-when i described it to dr. marchand, she said i needed to get her an appt. she said, she didn't want to worry me, but moles on the scalps of little ones are tough-she said they are either really bad, or nothing at all...so she wants to see her. i called her pediatrician to get the referral before i even got out of the parking lot. you just never know and we want to make sure we stay on top of this. marcus doesn't want his girls to have to go through what he did, so when i told him what the dr. said, he was glad i called to get the referral!

now, as if we don't already have enough on our minds to be concerned about, we are on standby, praying that marcus doesn't have to go on strike. the contract ends at midnight on saturday-so please say a prayer that no strike has to happen!!!!!!!!!! i know i will be saying tons of prayers! :) thank you all for your continued love, support, prayers, encouragement-we love you all!!

treatment limbo, life limbo..how low can you go???

well, this is now the 4th week that marcus' liver enzymes are still too high for his interferon treatement.....it had gone up to 5 times the normal (honestly i don't know what the numbers are, i am just going by what he told me dr. lavalais told him) anyways, she said she would not resume his regular treatments until he was completely back to normal-and every week he has to go in for the labs-and wait......dr. lavalais decided that he will decrease down to 9 million units per shot once he can resume..and i just feel like we are in limbo!! not only with treatment, but life too !! we are still waiting for all the insurance stuff to go through so we can fix the roof, fence etc, that was damaged during hurricane ike-then we will put the house on the market so we can finally begin the journey of building on our land in silsbee. we had hoped to have completed that last year, but melanoma interrupted. i am not complaining-just venting! i know that we are so blessed that marcus' melamona was caught at the stage it was, and that surgery removed it and that the interferon treatments will help prevent future recurrance....i just pray it all goes according to plan....cancer is so scary-it just does whatever it wants-and i don't like it!!!!!!!!!!

anyways, i am attaching a pic of marcus and i around christmas time at one of the many family gatherings we were blessed to be part of. we both have wonderful families and i truly thank God for them all. our girls are so blessed to have so many people that love them!! :)

14 years of marriage!!!

I cannot believe that marcus & i have been married 14 yrs today!!! we have been together 17 total years-and that in itself is amazing to me!!! we are getting way too old!!! anyways, i was making a list of memories over the last 14 years for him and i thought back to this picture-it was taken by his youngest brother cory, i think in 1995-we were going to some kind of banquet thingy and dressed up-don't you LOVE the strappy dress?!?! what was i thinking? anyways-we look so young here and i truly realize how fast time flies by!! i am so grateful for every second we have had together and am proud to be his wife!! marcus is an amazing person and is truly my hero. if it weren't for him, i don't know where i would be-or what kind of person i would be...he inspires me, motivates me, makes me keep an open mind and encourages me to push the limit-never accept things as they are-keep on keeping on!!! he is a great father and i couldn't have asked for a better man to live my life with and raise our precious girls with....he is my knight in shining armour-my soulmate!!!! HAPPY ANNIVERSARY BABY!! I LOVE YOU!!!

let it snow!!!!

the girls had a blast in the snow!!! we never get snow like this, so what a treat!!!

update on marcus: he had a rough start back on his interferon shots, after being off for a few weeks due to his infection-but he is going strong. he discussed with dr. lavalais his decision to see if she could cut the dose in half-or he might have to consider stopping the treatments all together...and of course, she didn't want that!! so he is now getting 18million units, 3 times/week and seems to be doing well. i just pray he can continue like this for the remainder of his treatment year.

hope everyone is having a great christmas season! we love you all!!

so last night we put up our tree. i have to admit that for some reason it has been hard to get into any kind of holiday spirit. but after watching the girls last night put the decorations on the tree and dance to christmas music, i am starting to feel the spirit :) i addressed all my christmas cards tonight and will start sending those out this week-i always love to do that too..so that helped with my spirit...BUT , Sela figured out the santa thing last night and asked me tons of questions-and when she asked me , " you aren't lying to me are you mom?", that is when i had to lay it all out....that is the main thing marcus never wanted to happen about the whole santa thing-he didn't want the kids to think we just flat out lied to them their whole lives about santa!!!! anyways, i explained to Sela how she still had to keep the secret for her little sis, and she seemed pretty cool with that-like she was "grown" and knew something her sis didn't :) kinda makes me sad that this point has come, but it was inevitable! my first baby is truly getting TOO big!!!

marcus has been doing much better since his surgery for his nasal celluitis. i am just praying when he goes back next week to discuss his shots, everything works out for the best. after not being on his shots for a few weeks, it will be hard for him to go back-especially with christmas coming around, i know he is not gonna want to feel sick....so i will just pray some more and i know God will take care of everything! :)

well, i love you all and hope you are getting into the spirit of the season! until next time....

he keeps fighting!!

well, this past week has been a roller coaster! as you know, while taking the interferon shots, marcus' immune system really takes a beating-and it is very hard for his body to fight even the smallest infection. well, a small pimple at the base of his nostril got bad-it turned into staph-then the dr. called it nasal cellulitis....and it made his upper lip swell twice its normal size!!! he was in horrible pain and was really struggling-the dr told him that if he did not get rid of the infection that it could erode the cartilage between the nostrils and his nose could collapse!!! you can imagine marcus' surprise and concern at that point!! well they scheduled surgery to cut it open and clean all the infection out-get a culture, etc....and that all happened on wed. he is much better now-he went to get the packing taken out yesterday and has to go back tues to make sure it is healing well-but things are much better now. in the process, he has not been able to take any interferon shots-and he is loving the way he feels without them!! he says when he goes back next week he will discuss with dr. lavalais the possibility of reducing the dosage so it doesn't knock his immune system down so much....i just pray that whatever happens, the melanoma NEVER returns.....

marcus has been so strong through all of this....he is a true warrior! thank you all for your continued prayers, support, encouragement, etc. we love you all and know we could not do any of this without you.